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Just for Kicks, I

A fun clip that was introduced over by Chris ^^ I like the music very much, and the reference to Chuck Norris is just sooooo hilarious…!! XD… MCAC is on a Chuck Norris rampage =P

Frustrated Rantings, I

Just tied up an online chat with Maya. Conversation topics started off with the usual bantering… but eventually it went onto the subject of her bro Ken and his current gf Miaoz. To be exact, it went onto the subject of how they were in relationshipal trouble.

Gah… I don’t get it. They’re both still young (oh okay, so Ken is just one year younger than me and Miaoz is one year younger than him and I’m not all that much older than them), so why are they both clinging so desperately to the notion that relationships must last forever, and just won’t admit that changing feelings are usually irreversible?? Why is the idea of breaking up so terrifying when it could be a release for everyone, and why can’t they just sit down and talk and sort all these things out like the rational people that we think they are?!

When they started going out last year we were all so happy for them. Ken isn’t like a player like what some of his crowd are, after all. And Miaoz is a girl from mine and Maya’s school who also visits our ’special’ forum, which means that we know her and we know her friends. So if the guy’s decent and the girl’s the right sort, and they click and seem to match and you’re pretty sure there won’t be accidents, why not be glad for their sake, right? (Besides, the cards said that it could be a good match, and I trust Maya’s cards >.>)

Well, so they started dating. So far so good.

Two, three, four, five months in, they’re still happily in love. So far, still good.

And then… I have no idea when… rifts cracked into the middleground. And they’re not doing anything at all about it, except mourning and moaning and avoiding each other and trying not to break down.

What the hell?

Man, Ken, if you’re getting scared of going on dates with her, TELL her!! Talk it out!! Stop penting everything inside!! All that your sis and I can do is try to counsel you–since Miaoz obviously thinks that everything we say is pro-you as we’re after all technically your kin. If you think that all you’ll end up doing after every date is fight, well find out the reason why!! How does it usually start? What is it usually about?? Are you unconsciously expressing some jealousy at how little time she’s spending with you now? Are you trying to reclaim her attention and hence her care and concern?? You blogged that your feelings for her have changed. If that’s the case, tell her frankly and up front, and NOW for goodness sake before this drags on and affects both your studies!! This isn’t a year for either of you to muck up. This is your deciding point and it WILL determine your future, whether you like it or not!!

And Miaoz… just ‘coz we’re related to Ken doesn’t mean we don’t emphasize with you! We’re all KC girls and well, girls, and we know how pigheaded or insensitive guys are sometimes. Why can’t you just talk it out to me or Maya and get the load off your heart? Things are always clearer when you look at it from a lighter perspective, ie when it’s not being pent up in your chest 24/7. TALK TO US!!! If you don’t think that he’s being sensitive enough, well fine, tell us how and in what way. If you think he’s being too controlling, well tell us and we’ll tell him. If you think he isn’t being concerned enough about you and not calling or texting you enough, well HELLO he’s doing his finals this year!!! Give the guy a bloody rest can you?? It’s exams period after all and he really needs to get this year right! As if you’re not doing your first finals this year too!! I don’t know what your current concerns are because you AREN’T saying anything!! What the heck are we supposed to do in this instance??

I know the two of you probably want to just shout to everyone else that this is your business and we should keep the hell out of it. But you know? We live in your universe too. We see what you guys are going through (okay so I don’t see. But Maya sees and what she sees I see!) and we don’t like what you’re doing to yourselves and to each another. I can’t play the role I usually do and be the listening ear I usually am. My phone bill would escalate sky high if I do so. And Maya is already worried that you guys aren’t gonna last long enough until I next come back.

I don’t want to come back to pick up pieces of a broken Ken and a broken Miaoz. I want to see you guys at least whole and healthy, even if not together.

Sometimes a brief pain seems hard to initiate, but isn’t it better than long-lasting hurts??

I can’t believe I just wasted half an hour typing this. I can’t believe I spent ONE HOUR talking about this with Maya, when I could have been chatting about other things.

I also can’t believe I censored out some things that I took almost ten minutes to write.

Sheesh.

I must be really irritated.

G’night >.<

Pickled Thoughts for Tea, I

Just five friend-relayed messages that resonated with me when I read them: (listed with edits)

• 1) Trust.

Trust is a very important factor in all relationships. When trust is broken, it signals the end of a relationship. Lack of trust leads to suspicion; suspicion generates anger; anger causes enmity and enmity may result in separation.

A telephone operator received a phone call one day. She answered, “Public Utilities Board.” There was silence. She repeated, “PUB.” There was still no answer. When she was going to cut off the line, she heard a lady’s voice, “Oh, so this is PUB. I’m sorry to take up your time! It’s just that I found this number from my husband’s pocket and got worried since I didn’t know whose number it was.”

Without mutual trust, just imagine what could have happened to the couple if the telephone operator had answered with just a “hello” instead of “PUB”.

• 2) Patience.

The following is a true story which happened in the United States.

A man came out of his home to admire his new truck. To his shocked anger, he found that his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny new paint of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him away, and hammered the little boy’s hands into pulp as punishment. When the father finally calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital.  Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers of the boy’s hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said: ” Daddy, I’m sorry about your truck”. Then he asked: “but … when are my fingers going to grow back?” The father was silent. Then he went home and committed suicide.

Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or you wish to take revenge. Think first before you lose your patience with someone you love. Trucks can be repaired. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can’t. Too often we fail to recognize the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge.
People always make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.

• 3) Consideration.

There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that “A sentence will either prosper or ruin a nation”. In the same way, many relationships break off because of wrong speech.

When a couple is too close with each another, they tend to forget mutual about respect and courtesy. They may say things without considering whether it will hurt the other party’s feelings.

A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A worker in a helmet saw her and shouted,”Hi, Emily! Remember me? We used to date in the secondary school”. On the way home, her millionaire husband teased her with the words: ”You’re lucky you married me, otherwise you would have become the wife of a construction worker”. She replied: “You should appreciate having married me. Otherwise, he would have been the millionaire and not you”.

That might seem like simple banter, but frequently exchanging these remarks may plant the seed for a bad relationship if one party harbours any grudges over it. Bad words said and souring relationships are like broken eggs - what’s done is done, and their effects can not be reversed.

• 4) Forgiveness.

A man asked his father-in-law, “Many people praised you for being able to maintain a successful marriage. Will you please share your secret with me?” The father-in-law answered with a smile, “Never criticize your wife for her shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind instead that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband than you.”

We all look forward to being loved and respected. Yet it is a fact that many people are afraid of losing face. Therefore generally, when a person makes a mistake, he will look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at. This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves. If we forgive others, others will ignore our mistakes too.

• 5) Conscience.

Different people have different perceptions. One man’s meat could be another man’s poison.

A couple bought a donkey from the market. On the way home, a passing boy commented: “That’s very stupid of them. Why are neither of them riding on the donkey?” Upon hearing that, the husband let the wife ride on the donkey. He walked beside them. Later, an old man saw the trio and commented: “The husband is the head of family. How can the wife ride on the donkey while the husband is on foot?” Hearing this, the wife quickly got down and let the husband ride on the donkey. Further on the way home, they met an old lady. She commented: “How can the man ride on the donkey but let the wife walk. He is no gentleman.” The husband thus quickly asked the wife to join him on the donkey. Then they met a young man. He commented: “Poor donkey, how can you hold up the weight of two persons. They are cruel to you.”  Hearing that, the husband and wife immediately climbed down from the donkey and carried it on their shoulders. It seemed, to them, the only choice left if they did not want to displease anyone. Later, on a narrow bridge, the donkey got frightened and struggled. The couple lost their balance and so all three fell into the river.

You can never have everyone praise you, but nor will everyone condemn you. Never in the past, not at the present and never in the future. Thus if your conscience is clear, do not be too bothered by other people comments or words.

….Meaningful, yes?